When there was an important task or project that you wanted to do, how often have you heard yourself say:
I do not have time for that.
I don't have enough time.
I am too busy right now.
Even when you knew that it was very important for you to do that task, your inner dialogue consisted of these statements:
I will do it another time.
When the time is right.
Later, not now.
And did that "later" moment in time ever come?
Recently, I found myself say, "Let me just do this, before I begin this." I also said, "Ah, that takes too much time. I rather wait until later, when I have more time." Rationally, this statement makes no sense. If I do not have time now, how will I ever have time later. Either I have time or I don't. But it makes complete emotional sense. The statement basically says, "I do not have the emotional energy to invest myself into this, right now. May be at another time, I will have the energy". It is not about time. It is about energy.
So what I am finding out is that anytime I am not wanting to do something right away, it is not so much about how much time I have, but how much emotional stamina or strength I feel I have in order to handle that particular task.
This is a very useful realization because now I know that any reference to not having enough time, at least for me, is a code that tells me that I do not feel confident that I can fully take care of a particular task to my satisfaction in that moment. This means also that my internal system is alerting me to get resources to help me before I can embark on that project. Too often we don't listen to that code message and quickly let that message flow over us and we "move on" to doing something else that may be emotionally "easier" in the moment. But this is very dangerous. Because by moving on, we really are not. We are neglecting, ignoring and hiding from what needs our immediate attention. By saying, "later", we are postponing our own sense of joy and peace. And if we learn to understand the code language and how to learn from and how to use it, we can actually bite into whatever we have in front of us, instead of superficially "moving on" to something else.
STEP 1. See What's Really Happening
So the first thing, like anything we do in our personal growth, is to become aware of what's happening. Just noticing it helps it to move from a nebulous, invisible phenomenon to something we can describe and put a finger on. For example, if there is a project that you want to start but are not able to begin, notice that. Notice if you are making excuses and what messages they contain. And whatever statement we are saying to ourselves, question it. For example, let us say this statement comes up: I will start that tomorrow. See if you can very gently ask yourself the question why. Why will I start tomorrow not today? And then let the answer come. I am too afraid of beginning today because...
I do not want to spend the whole day and still not be able to complete it
I do not want to start something which I am not sure how it will look when done
I do not know if I am fully prepared for it and what if I do not know all the answers
I am feeling overwhelmed by the complexity of it
I am feeling guilty that I have not yet begun it already and I should have 10 min, 10 hours, 10 days, 10 years ago
I am afraid that I will be successful and then I don't know what will I do
I am not sure if I can be consistent with it if I start now
I don't trust myself and I am afraid I will slack off or lose interest in it half way and then it will be incomplete
Basically, the code "I will start tomorrow or later" or "I don't have time now" is a message from your internal being that is saying this:
PLEASE HELP ME. PLEASE HELP ME RESOLVE THIS PROBLEM. I ABSOLUTELY WANT TO DO THIS BUT I CANNOT BEGIN WITHOUT SOME EXTERNAL HELP. PLEASE GET INSPIRATION FROM SOMETHING OR SOMEONE. PLEASE REACH OUT FOR HELP SO I CAN EMBARK ON THIS TASK WHICH I SO WANT TO DO BUT AM NOT ABLE TO. PLEASE HELP ME NOW.
STEP 2: Get the Help Your Inner Self is Asking for
So once you decode the message go on to Step 2 which is to get the help. Talk to a friend and just describe what you are feeling and experiencing. Then ask them to give you some advice on how to go on. It is always easier to hear such advice from another person when your inner self is asking for help. Then listen carefully to that advice. The other person will know exactly what to say to you because they will be divinely guided. Your guides are always helping you and when you ask for help, they immediately help you directly or through other people and circumstances. Another suggestion is to go for a walk, or take a bath or cook a delicious meal, or do something that will help you to relax.
STEP 3: Take Action
Step 3 is to implement the first piece of advice from the friend that resonates with you and you feel good about it. It may not be easy but you will feel that it is the right thing to do. And then do it. If you have gone for a walk, you will come back ready to embark the task you had hesitated or postponed before. You will be able to take action and that is what Step 3 is about.
You will find that already after Step 1, you feel much better. You are able to put a handle on the problem. After Step 2, once you have shared your situation with a good friend or journaled about it or gone for a walk, you may find that things seem much more possible. You feel lighter. And all of this prepares you for Step 3 which is to go ahead and do the thing that you most wanted to do but could not find time for.
There may be other messages hidden in these outward excuses. Excuses are our friend. They are codes and they give us hints to our internal emotional landscape. Let us not just used them superficially. Let us look deeper. There will be something underneath there waiting for us to be found. Learn to decode these code phrases and help yourself to move through obstacles. And of course please do share what you have learned from your own codes that others can learn and benefit from. Every little bit helps the puzzle.
Here is to learning to understand the language of codes from our inner self. And to decoding them so we can literally move on.
Do the first step of decoding. Ask the question why to any surface statements/excuses that come up. Let that be your starting point. Ask why as many times you need to get to the core of the issue. Your inner self is waiting for you to probe so it can give you the answers.